She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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