Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize
