names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
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