i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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