Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
