was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
