btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
