So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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