He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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