Well douche your snatch and let's go!
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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