i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
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