Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
