She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
