I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
The feeling are messing with the penis
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
