No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
