I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
only you would photoshop your dick
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
