Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
