either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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