you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
