dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
birth control should be required to get into college
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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