all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
