I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
