My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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