im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
love makes seman taste better
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize