I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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