i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
