absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Dicks are not precious.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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