I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
