I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
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