Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
