Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
