she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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