38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Randomize
