i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize