Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
As shirtless as possible
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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