yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
