you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
