does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
