I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
