About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
There r osticjed everywhere
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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