why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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