so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
