I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
