im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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