"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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