i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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