I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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