ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
