i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
