Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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